Shaving Tales Competition

[alfredus]

What's up guys, nobody wants to share?

 

[filobiblic]

What's up guys, nobody wants to share?

I want to. I just fly close to deadlines...

 

[Draco Noir]

A little disappointing @alfredus - I hope we see something soon or this thread will need mouth to mouth resuscitation...

 

[Mark1966]

There are two fine, high quality contributions already. Do we need more???

 

[alfredus]

A little disappointing @alfredus - I hope we see something soon or this thread will need mouth to mouth resuscitation...

Looks more like an emergency heart transplant

There are two fine, high quality contributions already. Do we need more???

Not going to dignify this with an answer...

 

[Draco Noir]

There are two fine, high quality contributions already. Do we need more???

Yes there are, but unfortunately as judges @alfredus and @Draco Noir aren't eligible for the prize

 

[Dale.Whiley]

Ashaving story?

Two razors walk into a bar. One razor says to the bartender … … …

 

[possumbelly]

The Lure of the Beast:
(An Ode to Muhle R41, 2011)

Silvery-chrome with
shimmer and sheen
sparkling seducingly
summoning me
Pledging perfection a
ploughing precise
promising smoothness
pray heed my advice
Beware the beast's blade it's
betraying keen bite the
beckoning bray of the
brute day or night
Stay wakeful alert un-
shaken unflinched
stay firm resolute
shave on use styptic

 

[Mark1966]

No. Words.

Simply awesome.

 

[alfredus]

FANTASTIC @possumbelly - this has certainly raised the bar!!!

 

[eggbert]

Straight or double edge
We all like our faces clean
Hipsters are beardos.

 

[possumbelly]

I can only assume you are all busy composing your masterpieces.
In the meantime I have penned this silly rhyme, Spike Milligan style:

"Daily Dilemmas"

Should I go with Strewth!?
'cause it's very leatherery
or should I choose Vanetiver?
which is very vetivery

 

[alfredus]

Great!

 

[Mark1966]

Just giving this a little bump along, although conscious that MY effort will take some beating ...

In the middle of an intensive unit in my JD otherwise I would aim to put another entry in - I suspect many people are beavering away in their garret on this as we speak though ...

 

[alfredus]

Seems like only one member in with a chance at the moment (sorry not you @Mark1966 ) - really nobody else interested in this great price???

 

[filobiblic]

Seems like only one member in with a chance at the moment (sorry not you @Mark1966 ) - really nobody else interested in this great price???

Absolutely. But also busy. (And we still have a full month to go... [emoji51])

 

[Mark1966]

Seems like only one member in with a chance at the moment (sorry not you @Mark1966 ) - really nobody else interested in this great price???

WHAT!!!!!

This is rigged!

I demand a recount!

See you in court ...

 

[alfredus]

Sure - but the judges will still be @Draco Noir , @Monsta_AU and myself

 

[Draco Noir]

Jeez, @alfredus, the word "slack" springs to mind. Here we are, surrounded by guys who can produce column metres of BS at the drop of a hat (and do so regularly), yet we haven't managed a single short story yet. And we need to be clear - it isn't a poetry or haiku competition : it's a short story competition.

If we don't see some endeavour soon, maybe we should just sell off the prize and buy ourselves a bunch of soaps or aftershave with the proceeds. What do you think?

Come on Paste and Cutters - there must be some fantastic ideas out there begging to be put into words....

 

[Mark1966]

Mine was a story.

It was short.

The judges have spoken - others are scared ...

Maybe I will give it another shot. In chapter form?

A Shaving Tale

Chapter One

Once upon a time ... no

It was the best of shaves, it was the worst of shaves ... no

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away ... no

Three shavers walked into a bar ... no

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good razor ... no

Of all the things that drive men to shave ... no

Oh, this is hard, really hard. Be back later ...