No, no no, let me show you how.
I received my Blobbie today [shows urgency of providing feedback over such an exciting event] and as as soon as I opened it I said to SWMBO [use these sort of cool terms to show how hip you are] - WOW, this is H-U-G-E [size is important as we all know, get the size clear first].
A TGN Best knot at about 45mm high - seems higher than the old World Trade Centers - paired with a Smog 1460 handle - and we all know they're nice handles, Leon at Vintage Scent is a great vendor and an incredible guy [need to get a gratuitous vendor plug in, never know, you might get a freebie]. Good flow, kills soft or hard soaps of any description, makes lather stupidly easy and very quickly - this is going to be great.
Fortunately I'd not shaved for three days and had a wicked growth [funny how this is always the case] so I went straight to the bathroom [again the sense of urgency needs to be stressed] to give this baby [note use of slightly misogynist language] a whirl.
Well, this baby didn't let me down. A splash of water then thrust into the Cella, my favourite Italian soap [you must ALWAYS use Cella]. I followed Marco's technique (see the 14 pages of discussion here). Thick rich lather, enough for 99 passes [emphasise quantity again] which the consistency of thick yoghurt. It was amazing. I've never experienced lather like this before. It takes shaving to a whole new level. I can't think of enough superlatives to describe how my face feels when I apply this lather, it makes me think of the breath of angels softly caressing my cheeks.
I had my Fatboy dialled up to 9 with a fresh Feather loaded, but I didn't feel it as it seemed to float across my face. Never, ever, has this ever happened to me before.
SWMBO commented not only on my silky smooth face but on my radiant glow. It was as if I'd emerged from the experience with a glow about me from being in the presence of such an amazing brush.
This one if definitely going into my rotation [this bit I don't get - if it is SOOOOO good why only IN your rotation?].
Thanks again to Drubs and Paste and Cut [make sure you thank profusely] for allowing me to experience this incredible brush [look out for it in to weeks on B/S/T as I move onto the next BIG thing].
There you do - does that help? What do the others think? Maybe we should score our attempts!